daddy's little girl
by join.me.in.the.thunder
Summary: and so she blamed the one man that ruined her childhood and the rest of her life. thanks so much, daddy. ; kinda oneshot, kinda not.


do you remember being a young child and looking up at your father like he was the biggest, most loveable man in the world? like he could keep you safe by just looking at you, and even though he sometimes got a little angry, you knew that you would still be 'daddy's little girl' that got loved and smothered with kisses at the end of the day?

yeah, alicia doesn't.

maybe that's why she can't hold a stable relationship to save her life.

crawing out of the king size bed, alicia put her lace thong back on, and trotted over to the closet to grab a robe. it was plush and warm, unlike her thin pink silk one at home. glancing over at the bed, she watched lune - or maybe it was dune? alicia didn't really know. - breathe for a few seconds before opening the door and sliding out into the hallway.

the sky was a dull black color, but alicia could see the traces of blue and yellow coming out from over the horizon through the big window that was placed above the double french doors. sighing, she stepped down onto the first stair while rubbing her head. maybe beer pong followed by body shots and an irish car bomb wasn't the best idea, but alicia had already been wasted, so what was the point? it's not like that ever stopped her before.

climbing over entangled limbs and a nice pile of pink vomit, alicia reached the ground level, then walked into the kitchen in search of some motrin. trying the cabnet next to the sink, alicia groaned in frustration as a clean pile of white china smiled back at her. slaming the cabnet shut, alicia tried another. glass coffee cups and wooden salad bowl stared out at her. alicia tried another, once again. no such luck. whining a little, alicia slamed the cabnet door shut and walked into the living room, flopping on the white leather couch and rubbing her head. an hd television played mtv's jersey shore out at her, but remained muted while vinny and pauly hit up their third bar of the night. glancing at the clock, alicia noted the time before shutting her eyes. three thrity gave her plenty of time to find a pair of sunglasses and call a taxi service to give her a ride home. no big deal.

'looking for this?' alicia opened her eyes to find a white bottle of ibuprofen looking back at her. greedily, alicia took it from the mysterious hand and twisted it open, pouring out five pills and in rapid succession, swallowing them without water. alicia smiled with her eyes closed before realizing that a human being was staring at her. slowly, alicia opened her eyes to see cam's big white smile and mulit-colored eyes looking down at her.

'feeling better yet?' he chuckled while alicia gave him a quick nod, 'maybe you should stay away from tequila from now on. you got pretty wasted after those body shots, and i wasn't sure where you went. i thought i saw you stumble upstairs with dune baxter, but i knew you would never, so i figured i would just wait. where'd you get that robe anyways?' cam rambled on, and alicia didn't have the heart or bodily functions to do so yet.

'cam,' alicia finally managed, though her dry lips cracked and her throat croaked her water.

'yeah?' cam replied, handing alicia a glass of water. alicia snatched it out of his hands before downing the glass in three seconds. then, as if he'd never done that little act of kindness, alicia continued.

'you need to stop.'

'what do you mean?'

'last night, with dune? yeah, i did 'do that'. i'm not good for you cam. you just need to give up.' alicia watched the slightest hint of hurt flicker through cam's blue and green eyes before he composed himself.

'alicia, i know you better than you think, and you're just lying to my when you say that stuff about how your not good for me. i mean, sure you've had your few bumps in the road with derrick and josh and all, but-'

'cam, stop.' alicia flinched at the mention of josh's name, then stood up, 'listen you're a really sweet boy, and i would love to think that your could 'change me' and all, but both you and i know that that will never happen, so you need to just stop. plus i don't want to hurt you more than i have to. i've been called a slut, and a whore, and a cunt and tons of other stuff, but 'bitch' is one of those words that people - other than angry girlfriends and the occasional boyfriend - call me. i don't want to hear that word come out of your mouth.' alicia turned away from cam's hurt and shocked face, 'so just go back to the good girls like clarie, kristen and massie. that's where you belong.' and before cam could utter another sound, alicia turned on her stilletto heels and walked out of the living room, out of layne abley's house, and out of layne's property.

because she didn't want cam to see how honestly hurt she'd been by her own words. she didn't want him to see the mascara-stained tears roll down her cheeks and the jackhammer that was pounding in her chest when she looked at his reaction.

because she knew it would only be a matter of time before she fucked up that relationship with drunken sex and no condem to show for evidence. derrick and josh both knew that side of alicia, the side that always overruled the good and healing side. so alicia wiped away her tears, pulled out her iphone, and pressed speed dial one. being a slutty, single bitch wasn't that bad, right?

and while alicia lied to herself that it wasn't, she blamed the same man that ruined her childhood and the rest of her life like she always did.

thanks so much, daddy.

_so, there you go. i keep telling myself, UPDATE BULLETPROOF AND THE REST OF YOUR FREAKIN' STORIES, but i don't._

_and i don't know if i ever will. so until then, please, enjoy my random one shots._

_thanks!_

_xoxo, join. me. in. the. thunder_


End file.
